’We called the new baby Ned,’ says a Lib-Dem voting, Guardian reading, London pal. For Ned’s sake, I hope the child never attends uni in Scotland. For, north of Carlisle, NEDS implies non-educated delinquent 'schemies' - scourge of the Bearsden/ Morningside genteel classes who live in fear of being ‘chibbed’ for crack spends by tooled-up, rickets-y youth with in trackies with track marks all over their spotty, self-tattooed skin. As fashion so often takes its cue from film and TV - if you had a tenner for every Mad Man manqué out there, you could buy up all of Greenock, Giffnock and Port Glasgow , should you so desire - how long before the streets are awash with doppelgängers from Peter Mullan’s Neds? For pure 70s period effect, adopt flares, long leatherette coat, feather cut hair and a penchant for kissing, Glasgow style. Alternatively, take a masterclass in contemporary Ned-ism courtesy of The Wee Man at http://tinyurl.com/cqwuky Either way, not a good look.
