Hollywood(en) Remakes

Most Americans never venture abroad. In fact, very few even have passports. After all, didn't they move the Eiffel Tower and  the pyramids of E-Jipt to Vegas? Could such insularity explain Yankee antipathy towards non-English language films, manna to studios that repackage world cinema for Mikey and Miley Mall-Rat’s consumption? But why do so many slightly more mondaine Brits ('yeh we've been to Benidorm, innit?') also lap up Hollywood(en) retreads? The ensuing car crash when Tim Story hijacked Jean-Luc Besson’s Taxi; Richard Gere’s vague turn as nouvelle vague icon Jean-Paul Belmondo in Breathless; the leaden Vanilla Sky: remakes rarely shine. Will David Fincher’s The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo really improve on the enthralling (subtitled) original? I admit, Brits occasionally play their part in cooking up a Stateside turkey. Mercifully, Lina Wertmüller as imagined by Guy Ritchie (and ‘star’ Madge) was deservedly Swept Away at the box office. The latest such Hollywood horror in cinemas is Francis Veber’s appetising French comedy, Le Dîner de Cons, regurgitated as Dinner For Schmucks. If you’re schmuck enough to fork out on indigestible tripe, go armed with Rennies - that's Pepto Bismol, or near enough, to my American friends.