Chefebrities

You can’t switch on the box without their ugly mugs gurning out at you. Jowelly Jamie, HF-W and Gordon Gobsh***, that is. Now even hitherto-above-it-all Heston wants a piece of the pie, serving up a TV makeover of some motorway caff that owed more than a little to Ramsay’s well-worn routine. When Jamie was still the Naked Chef - a sight now likely to have me upchucking the chorizo and chick pea on ciabatta - their patter was mildly entertaining. Britain could not be allowed to exist on boil-in-the-bag-cod alone, after all. Nowadays their sheer ubiquity makes these serial airtime whores plain indigestible. What next? If reports about troubles in Big Sweary’s empire are to be believed, a new mutation: Jamie Saves Gordon’s Bacon. Somebody cull these kitchen nightmares now!